As Seen On Screen

As Seen on Screen offers readers a chance to see film reviews for the everyman, without all of the clutter and nonsense fed to the average filmgoer. Plain, straitforward, to the point. That's our goal. We offer a diverse catalogue of which to choose from, from silent comedies to modern superhero films. Final note: this is a family friendly blog. We only review films rated G through PG-13, plus the unrated films of yesteryear. So if this sounds like your cup of tea, pull up a crumpet and enjoy. Thanks for your support!

Sunday, January 20, 2019

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     The Shadow Strikes
1937  NR  DRAMA  1h 1min
CAST— Rod La Rocque
MUSIC— Unknown  DIRECTOR— Lynn Shores  BASED ON— Characters appearing on The Shadow (radio)

     Super quickie mystery that produces more yawns than thrills. After the Shadow foils a robbery at an attorney’s office he, as his alter ego Lamont Granston (Cranston), leads the police to believe that he’s the attorney. Now a pseudo-lawyer he is called upon to draw up a will for a wealthy gentleman. When the man is murdered Granston is drawn into the case. Using various outdated sleuthing methods (none of which involve donning the guise of the Shadow) he and his driver/sidekick get the job done. Nothing groundbreaking here.
OUR RATING— * ½
FOLLOWED BY— International Crime (1938)

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     The Shadow Riders
1982  NR  WESTERN/TELEVISION  1h 36min
CAST— Tom Selleck, Sam Elliott, Ben Johnson, Geoffrey Lewis, Jeffrey Osterhage, Gene Evans, Katherine Ross
MUSIC— Jerrold Immel  DIRECTOR— Andrew V. McLaglen  BASED ON— The Shadow Riders (novel), by Louis L’Amour

     Inauspicious Western telefilm that starts out well but meanders along the way. Tom Selleck and Sam Elliott star as two brothers (one blue, the other gray) whose paths collide after the Civil War. They soon learn that their sisters, Elliott’s girl Katherine Ross and many others have been kidnapped by renegades, former rebels who long to see the South restored to its former glory. The rebels plan to buy back that glory with the money they make by selling their captives into slavery. Selleck and Elliott will have none of this. They set out to free the captives and just maybe reignite the spark between Elliott and Ross. A forgettable experience (you probably won’t even remember the fun finale), though entertaining for the duration.
OUR RATING— **
















     Shadow of the Thin Man
1941  NR  COMEDY  1h 37min
CAST— William Powell, Myrna Loy, Barry Nelson, Donna Reed, Sam Levene, Alan Baxter
MUSIC— Edward Ward  DIRECTOR— W. S. Van Dyke II

     A day at the races! As Nick and Nora Charles share in this guilty pleasure there’s trouble brewing behind the scenes. Gamblers and racketeers roam the grounds of multiple sporting events while bodies accumulate. It’s up to Nick (terrier Asta in tow) to get the dirt on the murderous scum once again. Plenty of comedy but too few scenes featuring both William Powell and Myrna Loy. Still, an entertaining ride into the convoluted world of murder and cover-ups.
OUR RATING— ** ½
PRECEDED BY— The Thin Man (1934), After the Thin Man (1936), Another Thin Man (1939)
FOLLOWED BY— The Thin Man Goes Home (1944), Song of the Thin Man (1947)

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     Shadow of a Doubt
1943  NR  SUSPENSE  1h 48min
CAST— Teresa Wright, Joseph Cotton, Macdonald Carey, Patricia Collinge, Henry Travers, Wallace Ford, Hume Cronyn
MUSIC— Dimitri Tiomkin  DIRECTOR— Alfred Hitchcock

     Another fine tale from the Master of Suspense, Alfred Hitchcock. Who inspires you? Your father? Your mother? Your murderous uncle who is wanted by the feds nationwide? To young Charlie the answer would be the latter. When her uncle Charles (after whom she was named) comes for a visit, everything is swell. But when his dark secrets begin to unravel, young Charlie’s inspiration soon becomes her worst nightmare. Packed full of drama and suspense, this one sure is a keeper. Final note: check out Hume Cronyn as a morbidly hilarious literary critic. Wouldn’t you love to have him over for a night of joyous conversation? Deemed “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant” by the United States Library of Congress National Film Registry.
OUR RATING— ***
REMADE AS— Step Down to Terror (1958), Shadow of a Doubt (1991)
















     The Shadow
1994  PG-13  ACTION  1h 48min
CAST— Alec Baldwin, John Lone, Penelope Ann Miller, Peter Boyle, Ian McKellen, Jonathan Winters, Tim Curry
MUSIC— Jerry Goldsmith  DIRECTOR— Russell Mulcahy  BASED ON— Characters appearing on The Shadow (radio)

     Alec Baldwin plays the title character in this fun, superhero-esqe fantasy. Lamont Cranston, billionaire/playboy (sound familiar?) is secretly The Shadow, a mysterious nighttime avenger with the ability to cloud the minds of men, giving him the power of relative invisibility against his enemies. But now a new threat comes to town: evil Shi-Wan Khan (last descendant of Genghis Khan) plans to use an atomic bomb on all of New York City, in an effort to complete his ancestor’s mission in life, that of total world domination. The plot is pretty standard, yeah, but the film is still pretty good, with interesting characters and effects, giving its 1930s theme a definite 1990s edge.
OUR RATING— ** ½

Saturday, January 19, 2019
















     The 7th Voyage of Sinbad
1958  NR  FANTASY  1h 28min
CAST— Kerwin Mathews, Kathryn Grant (Crosby), Richard Eyer, Torin Thatcher
MUSIC— Bernard Herrmann  DIRECTOR— Nathan Juran

     Ridiculous telling of the Sinbad Legend, this time fleshed out with special effects by the master, Ray Harryhausen. Sinbad and his band of sailors run afoul of a malevolent magician with a magical lamp on his mind. He loses the lamp when Sinbad rescues him from a killer Cyclops; he then journeys to Baghdad with the sailors, all the while yearning for the lamp. To coerce Sinbad into returning to the Cyclops-infested island Mr. Magician shrinks Sinbad’s fiancée down to Barbie’s size and claims that the only remedy lies on the island. From then on it’s all sailing, monsters, and mayhem, Harryhausen style, only minus the fun. Maybe you had to be there. Deemed “culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant” by the United States Library of Congress National Film Registry.
OUR RATING— *
















     The Seventh Seal
1957  NR  DRAMA  1h 36min
CAST— Max Von Sydow, Gunnar Bjornstrand, Nils Poppe, Bibi Andersson, Bengt Ekerot
MUSIC— Erik Nordgren  DIRECTOR— Ingmar Bergman  BASED ON— Wood Painting (play), by Ingmar Bergman

     Highly acclaimed allegory in which a world weary knight finds himself locked in a battle of wits with Death himself. Death comes to claim the knight but he first accepts a challenge to play a game of chess. As their game commences they study one another, engaging in meaningful conversation, neither one backing down from a challenging query. Meanwhile, all about them the land is laid desolate with people dying of the black plague. The knight, having just returned from the crusades, now sees the chaos around him and wonders about the meaning of life, about the existence of God, etc. Fine film for foreign film buffs and film students but from the viewpoint of the average movie-goer the entertainment value is sorely lacking. May take several viewings to sort out the details. In Swedish with English subtitles.
OUR RATING— * ½















     17 Again
2009  PG-13  COMEDY  1h 45min
CAST— Zac Efron, Leslie Mann, Thomas Lennon, Michelle Trachtenberg, Matthew Perry
MUSIC— Rolfe Kent  DIRECTOR— Burr Steers

     Ah, those teenage years! If only we could revisit those glory days. Well, Matthew Perry has the chance to do that. With his life falling down around him he wishes that he could have lived up to his potential. When he gets sucked into a mysterious vortex he reemerges as his teenage self, played by Zac Efron. His dorky best friend (played by scene stealer Thomas Lennon) helps him to realize that this is his second chance to make right. But how? He soon sees that his children, now teenagers, as well, and his wife are not the image of stability either. As the new kid on the block he begins to mend his broken relationships, all while trying to pass as a normal teen. It isn’t easy being a man-child. Taking a familiar formula, as seen in many films of the past (Freaky Friday [1977], 18 Again! [1988]), this teen comedy follows a predictable pattern. Best suited to kids who’ve never seen these earlier pictures.
OUR RATING— ** ½















     Seven Samurai
1954  NR  DRAMA  3h 27min
CAST— Toshio Mifune, Takashi Shimura, Yoshio Inaba, Ko Kimura, Seiji Miyaguchi, Minoru Chiaki
MUSIC— Fumio Hayasaka  DIRECTOR— Akira Kurosawa

     Throughout history man has struggled to protect his people by facing incredible odds, regardless of the risk involved. Centuries past, in Japanese culture, there was a certain class of warrior known as the Samurai, trained to fight with dignity and honor. This film chronicles the adventures of seven such Samurai, a ragtag team of characters ranging from the honorable to the jolly, from the quiet to the comic. When a small village is in danger of losing their crops to a band of roving marauders, the Samurai are recruited for protection. When they arrive they realize what easy targets these poor farmers are, so combat training is soon under way.  Bring it on, bandits! The only drawback to the film is its length, running at about three and a half hours, but it’s worth viewing for the camaraderie between the players and the exciting battle sequences throughout. Domo arigato. In Japanese with English subtitles.
OUR RATING— ** ½
REMADE AS— The Magnificent Seven (1960)
















     7 Faces of Dr. Lao
1964  NR  FANTASY  1h 40min
CAST— Tony Randall, Barbara Eden, Arthur O’Connell, John Ericson, Kevin Tate, Argentina Brunetti, Noah Beery, Jr., Minerva Urecal, John Qualen, Lee Patrick
MUSIC— Leigh Harline  DIRECTOR— George Pal  BASED ON— The Circus of Dr. Lao (novel), by Charles G. Finney

     Here’s an odd one. Tony Randall plays six fantastic characters (plus a cameo of himself sans make-up) in this weird Western fantasy. In the small frontier town of Abalone a tiny circus comes to visit, fronted by a 2,000 year-old stereotypical Chinaman named Dr. Lao (Randall). In his circus are six exhibits featuring characters from myth including Medusa and Pan. During his stay in Abalone he unites lovers and cleans up corruption, all while using illusive philosophy and various accents. Not for every taste; suitable for the curious.
OUR RATING— **

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

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     Seven Chances
1925  NR  COMEDY  56min
CAST— Buster Keaton, T. Roy Barnes, Snitz Edwards, Ruth Dwyer, Frankie Raymond, Jules Cowles
MUSIC— Silent  DIRECTOR— Buster Keaton  BASED ON— Seven Chances (play), by Roi Cooper Megrue

     Buster Keaton delivers again in this nail-biter of a comedy. Keaton is a small-time businessman who stands to inherit a whopping $7,000,000… providing he marries by 7:00 PM on his twenty-seventh birthday. Tonight, in other words. He has seven whole hours to tie the knot otherwise the deal is kaput. After numerous proposals and just as many rejections it seems he’s doomed to remain a bachelor. Until, that is, his business partner runs an ad in the paper offering first dibs to any female to show for an impromptu wedding. That’s when things get crazy. Women of all shapes and sizes stampede the city seeking their hopeful groom while he runs in terror through all manner of life threatening obstacle. Starts out kinda slow but when the action starts you’d better hang on. Go, Buster, go!
OUR RATING— ***
REMADE AS— The Bachelor (1999)
















     Sergeant Rutledge
1960  NR  WESTERN  1h 41min
CAST— Jeffrey Hunter, Woody Strode, Constance Towers, Billie Burke, Carleton Young, Juano Hernandez, Willis Bouchey, Mae Marsh, Hank Worden, Jack Pennick
MUSIC— Howard Jackson  DIRECTOR— John Ford

     Another exceptional Western from director John Ford, this time a mystery on our hands. A young girl has been raped and murdered, her father also killed. Seen leaving the scene of the crime was a black cavalry officer, played by Woody Strode. After being detained he neither confirms nor denies the charges against him. But Strode proves his meddle when heading back to fort; Apaches are on the warpath, and his instincts help to save the very troop that will take him to trial. A courtroom drama, told in flashbacks, this tale contains plenty of action and suspense, not to mention a comical performance by a prudish Billie Burke. A real gem.
OUR RATING— ***
















     The Sentinel
2006  PG-13  ACTION  1h 48min
CAST— Michael Douglas, Kiefer Sutherland, Eva Longoria, Kim Basinger, Martin Donovan, Ritchie Coster, Blair Brown, David Rasche, Paul Calderon, Gloria Reuben
MUSIC— Christophe Beck  DIRECTOR— Clark Johnson  BASED ON— The Sentinel (novel), by Gerald Petievich

     Michael Douglas laces up his running shoes for this thriller that uncovers a secret within the United States Secret Service. Douglas is a Secret Service veteran, a legend to his coworkers. But if word got out that he’s been sleeping with the First Lady he may wanna start filling out job applications. Anyway, there’s a rumor that someone’s plotting to kill the President and Douglas is suspected of being involved. To prove his innocence he goes on the lam to find those setting him up, staying two steps ahead of Secret Service agent (and former friend) Kiefer Sutherland and newbie Eva Longoria. All too predictable, though mildly entertaining for the duration.
OUR RATING— ** ½
















     Send Me No Flowers
1964  NR  COMEDY  1h 40min
CAST— Rock Hudson, Doris Day, Tony Randall, Hal March, Paul Lynde, Edward Andrews, Patricia Barry, Clint Walker
MUSIC— De Vol  DIRECTOR— Norman Jewison  BASED ON— Send Me No Flowers (play), by Norman Barasch and Carroll Moore

     Rock Hudson and Doris Day join forces yet again for this all-out laugh riot that proves laughter truly is contagious. Hudson plays a raging hypochondriac who, after misdiagnosing himself, believes his days to be numbered. Long-suffering wife Day has no clue as to his worries, yet to best friend Tony Randall he spills all. Hudson feels pity for his poor wife, who will soon be without the protection of a husband; he begins to set in motion a plan that will find a suitable husband for Day, without her knowledge or consent. This plan eventually backfires, of course; much to his horror, much to our delight. Co-starring the ever affable Paul Lynde as an over enthusiastic cemetery plot salesman; Randall’s performance as the sympathetic inebriate steals the show. Your funny bone won’t know what hit it.
OUR RATING— *** ½